Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays

Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays family relocation family relationships  Mi vida la pequeñita mija

Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays

Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays family relocation family relationships  Mi vida la pequeñita mija The holidays can be an emotional time in our family.  Three years ago, we relocated to South Dakota from Michigan, and it’s been a lonely journey.  We moved here knowing that we had no family, no friends…but we had to escape a bad economy and Michigan and our first priority was financial stability.  It was worth the sacrifices.

I talk about some of those sacrifices a little bit here and more here.

We miss our family.  We miss our hometown.  We miss living on Lake Michigan, the food, the community, our church.  It just isn’t the same here in South Dakota and it probably never will be.

Over the past three years, we’ve talked more than once about relocating again.  We want to be closer to our family in Michigan, we want to live in a more diversity city and we want our daughter to be exposed to Spanish daily.  We’ve talked about the possibilities of both Chicago and San Antonio…each boasting a unique mix of cultural heritage and only a short drive from our families.

The more we think about it, the more it becomes a reality…we aren’t going to stay here.  South Dakota is not for us and family is just too important to us to live this far away.

We ended up leaving Michigan just days after Christmas 2009.  Hubby lost his job and there was no work in Michigan and after searching for months and living with family in a spare bedroom, we just couldn’t stay ignore the realities anymore.  We wanted better for our daughter, and better wasn’t going to happen in Michigan.

Relocating to South Dakota

Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays family relocation family relationships  Mi vida la pequeñita mija That meant hubby leaving us for two months to plan a life for us elsewhere.  That two months after Christmas were difficult for all of us.  I couldn’t be there to encourage my husband, he wasn’t there to hug me goodnight or kiss Lily and rock her to sleep.  Those were difficult times and I wondered, with Lily being so young (she was just over 1 year old), would she forget her papi?  Would she be nervous when she met him again?

I did my best to make sure that those questions didn’t become realities, and we looked at pictures and videos of daddy often to fill in the blanks.  He called each day, and we both waited at the phone each night to hear his voice for those 10-15 minutes.  It never felt like enough though, and luckily it only lasted two months before we were on our way to South Dakota.

Celebrating the Holidays Alone

Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays family relocation family relationships  Mi vida la pequeñita mija Leaving Michigan behind has been especially hard, and I’ve tried to be sure that my daughter’s Christmases here in South Dakota are special and memorable, but it’s hard without family.  Just like we hurt that we couldn’t be near papi, it hurts to have our family so far away.  My daughter wants to see her cousins and hold them.  She wants to pick them out a present and hand it to them herself, watching their faces light up with excitement.  Although she doesn’t say it, I think she wants to be the center of attention too.  She wants to visit grandma and have her special tickle time and enough hugs to make up for all the ones she’s missed.

Family Relocation & Lonely Holidays family relocation family relationships  Mi vida la pequeñita mija

I feel so bad about the holidays sometimes.  We don’t have family…it’s just our little group of three.  That’s fine and all, but sometimes you just need more than that.  Sometimes you need that obnoxious house full of loud relatives to remind you of how much you have.  Sometimes you miss laughing with them, hugging them, holding them close and even just smelling their scent in the air.

I miss my mom.  I miss my nephews and nieces.  I miss watching my daughter rolling around on the floor with her cousins.  It’s just hard this time of year.  I try not to think about it too much, but I think that our relocation plans for next year make it seem even more real…we want to go home.

 

Comments

  1. Connie Gomez says

    As A child we migrated with my parents to
    where ever the work was…. I didn’t think much of it….now as an adult with kids of my own and the possibility of travel thru my Hubby’s job…. I think twice about stability about family about starting over in an unknown place…..so I totally understand you! :( I hope that your plans work out and you get to relocate to a better future…..huge hug Chantilly!!! Stay strong Amiga you will do awesome no matter where you go…. I hope you pick San Antonio! You will be close and we can meet! :)

    • Chantilly Patiño says

      Thanks Connie! We moved around a lot when I was a kid too. We must have had 14 different locations under our belts by the time we were teens…no lie. I hated it because it always meant leaving my friends behind and I never felt settled as a child.

      I definitely thought it would be easier to relocate, but the culture here is just so different. It’s very dry conservative, plus it’s so hard to be away from family.

      I will keep you posted on where we decide to move to. So far, we’re leaning toward Chicago, but San Antonio is still a possibility. Either way, we have to get our buts down to Laredo to see our familia, so we’ll meet up with you one way or another! ;)

    • Chantilly Patiño says

      Thanks Aisha. :) We’re working on it. This year not having family has really gotten to us a lot more because our daughter is old enough now to realize how far away our family is. She misses them so much and it just breaks my heart. ♥

  2. desumama says

    Oh, this just broke my heart. I’m happy to hear you guys are considering relocation. It’s important to be near those you love and who love you. Happy holidays, amiga!

    • Chantilly Patiño says

      Thanks Nessa. :) You are such a good friend. ♥ I’m looking forward to moving closer to home for sure! ;)

      I’ve been watching all your holiday posts and I love them! We’re putting up our Christmas tree today, so I’ll get some pics up to show off…lol.

      Hug the familia for us! :)

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